17 June 2026

Hello, dear soul, and welcome back to the Alchemy Scrolls.

It’s been a while, hasn’t it?

I know… I know…

I said this was going to be a weekly thing, and then I bounced for two months. Perhaps it was because the scrolls were not calling my name. And while I’m trying to be kinder to myself, and not wallow in self-loathing for not going according to plan, I am back to unravel a new scroll because it is time.

Perhaps one needs to live through experiences to speak about them authentically. My lived experiences in the past form a blueprint for healing, for coming out of the dark and stepping back into one’s power.

But at the end of the tunnel, on the other side, shrouded in light and wearing the dark like a cloak of honour, I was faced with a question:

“What now?”

I’d become so accustomed to my healing, journaling like it was a ritual, meditating religiously, confining myself to four walls because I’d turned my space into a safe one. For a long time, this was purposeful, and I needed to come back home to myself. I needed to do this. I needed to become my own safe space, in my body, soothing my nervous system with peace instead of chaos.

It’s a requirement during one’s healing journey. Becoming your own safe space is what your body needs to get out of fight or flight mode, survival mode, and it’s one of the critical acts of self-love. Because self-love is not a passing feeling, but a conscious choice to wake up each day and be kinder to your body, mind, and spirit.

Once I reprogrammed my mind, quieted it, and found the peace I’d been seeking from the moment I realised I needed to change my life, I became comfortable. Comfortable with the peace I created. Comfortable with my career, my lifestyle, my lot in life.

Not that there’s anything wrong with it.

The peace I have now, the peace I’ve worked hard to achieve, is something I prayed so hard for. And yet, the question remained.

“What now?”

I looked around me and discovered that while I didn’t seek external validation anymore, I did want to live. I want to experience the good things life has to offer. I want to meet good people, surround myself with quality, uplifting connections, and feast on the joys all around me. The journey of self-discovery within myself has branched outward. Not chasing external validation anymore, but rather, allowing good things to put a smile on my face.

Happiness.

Someone told me not too long ago that happiness isn’t our right. It isn’t something that is owed to us. Not by God or the Universe, or anyone outside of ourselves.

And I believe this sentiment in a way that doesn’t make me numb to feeling happy. But instead, I would like to forge a path and build a life for myself that brings together peace and happiness.

I guess happiness only comes from the lens with which you look at life. Experiences that shape you can be traumatic, but in the end, it is up to us to decide if we carry that pain into the future, or if we leave it behind in exchange for peace of mind. And happiness? That can come from any place, and it always depends on your perspective.

For me, happiness is the chirping of birds outside in the morning, the smell of coffee wafting into the room, a slow, unhurried routine that doesn’t expect much from me. I used to believe that happiness was tied to achievements, to material possessions, and while that might be true for someone else - each to their own - my happiness comes from the small joys in life. The things that I can still find gratitude for.

That’s why I’m here today, unraveling this scroll with you, as a reminder that sometimes, you just have to sit back and remind yourself that there is a lot to be grateful for.

That’s what I’ve been doing for the past few weeks, even as the triggers still keep popping up.

They don’t affect me as much as they used to. A lot of what still triggers me, is what I need to deal with somatically. The body remembers and holds onto the traumas we’ve faced, and releasing it on a somatic level is just another aspect of the healing journey.

I guess that means I’m not really stepping off the path, but rather, finding a new path to walk. And while I am here, I will still continue to shed light on the things I’ve experienced. Not to carry them with me, but to welcome anyone who chooses to heal with open arms, and that little thing called hope, that could make all the difference once you decide to embark on your own healing journey.

Unlike some of the previous scrolls, which carried fire, this one is a soft landing, a gentle reminder that when the storm passes, you can choose to be happy, too.

I can’t promise that the torch won’t be lit when things need to be burned, but I can promise that the scrolls will always carry truth.

From my heart to yours,

Raaia.